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 Bereavement - Practical Helps
Going through the day-to-day tasks after a loss can
be challenging, but with some forethought and planning, some stress can be
avoided. Below are just a few ideas that may make life easier. You may also
want to talk to someone you know who has lost a loved one, and ask them what
helpful tips they may have to offer you.
- Find a non-judgmental
friend to listen as you express your feelings.
- Postpone major
decisions for at least a year if possible to be sure you are clear about
what you really want.
- Delegate social
responsibilities until you are ready to return.
- Rest. Everything
seems darker when you're tired.
- Eat healthy foods.
Grief work bums a lot of calories.
- Exercise. Research
shows that exercise releases endorphins into our system which help in
alleviating depression.
- If you are now alone,
leave the lights on when you go out.
- If a widow, find a
male friend to record the message for your answering machine so that
callers will not know if you live alone. You may also use your husband's
name in the phone book or list just your initial rather than your first
name.
- Sit down and make a
list of things that need done with the change of seasons (check heater,
add antifreeze) and ask friends for names of reputable service centers.
- Plan holidays. Make a
list of what you are comfortable doing and what you want to change.
Inform family ahead of time if you are changing tradition.
- It is OK to ask for
help with shopping or other holiday activities (Christmas dinner at your
house) if you are not up to it.
- Join a club or class.
It can boost your self-esteem to get out and do something with other
people.
- Be kind to yourself.
You wouldn't expect to run a marathon with a broken leg. Broken hearts
also take time to heal!
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